Zelda's Inferno exercise: Lies

This is from two weeks back. The exercise: write a 10 line poem in which every line is a lie. (Idea taken from the list here: http://amyking.wordpress.com/2008/04/02/daisy-frieds-poetry-exercises/ . ) Note that, like all my poems, this is from the point of view of a narrator who may not be me -- in other words, when I say these are lies, I may be lying. Or, not. And it's not 10 lines, anyway...

I've never stolen anything in my life
And the check is in the mail
And I'm not in love with her anymore

I don't get angry anymore
And I've certainly never wanted to punch someone in the face,
      over and over again
And I'm not in love with her anymore

I never break the speed limit
And I've never run a red light
And I'm not in love with her anymore

I was late for work because I had car trouble
And I don't know where that baggie came from, officer,
     someone must have left it in my car...
And of course, I assure you, I say with 100% honesty:
     I'm not in love with her anymore

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