Dentistry, Death, and Drama

Well, the smoking ban is finally in effect statewide - I'm at Bedrock, my first time here, and I'm looking forward to a night in a Baltimore bar without smelling like stale cigarettes the next morning.

And boy, do I need a few drinks tonight.

The week began fine enough, Monday we got the clawfoot tub uncrated and moved in to place on the platform, I got a full day's computer work in (even if I did spend much of it chasing down a dead end), and visited the parental units in the evening. Slightly stressful there, as I learned that the financial situation is tight for them - but as I was to be reminded, that's really not a big deal.

Tuesday, off to the dentist's for a long overdue checkup and cleaning. Had him look at a tooth that's been giving me an occasional twinge. He told me a filling needs to be replaced - we'll do that (and another one that looked iffy) on Monday. Good to get rid of old mercury amalgam and replace it with a nicer composite. Also had him look at a weird spot on my tongue, he said it's probably no big deal but recommended an evaluation by an oral surgeon.

Came home, a few hours of hacking, off to karate class. Stopped home after, to get something to eat before heading off to the first Zelda's Inferno open mic at 2640, and I happened to check my e-mail while I was there. Got a message from Nicole informing me that Cathy's mom had died.

So of course I called Cathy right away - which is only about the fourth time we've talked since she broke up with me. Not because I'm angry with her or she with me, but I'm very very much not over her, and it's hard. But of course that's irrelevant for the moment. We talked for a little while, I got the story of how only a few days before her mom had gone into the hospital, the whole think was pretty quick. I offered any support I could give.

Went down to the open mic, which went well, over 15 performers and about ten more people hanging out. Suffered for my art by forcing my wounded finger to play some guitar, but the reception was worth it.

Wednesday, got some stuff done around the house (not as much as I'd like, but some). Called Cathy again in the evening to check on her and just to give support as best I could. And yesterday, just a day really.

Today, did a shiatsu session for a new client at the Well, changed into that coat and tie thing, grabbed a quick lunch at Sara and Desmond's, then off to the funeral home.

Dorian, Amethyst, and Jason were there, the Baltimore folks were coming later. I talked with Cathy a bit, held her, offered what comfort I could.

But at the same time, it was hard to meet her new boyfriend - not just to see her with someone else, but with someone that she had ended her relationship with me in order to be with. A double bind of wanting to comfort her however I could, and of finding it hard to be there, of having my own emotional shit come up - and then feeling guilty for having my own emotional shit come up at a time when I should be focused on supporting her. She actually asked me if I was ok when I hugged her goodbye; I told her I missed her, but that was a drama for a different time.

My acupressure workshop at the Well was a wash, no attendees, so I stopped home for food and headed out on the town early. Down here to Bedrock,the latest incarnation of the space that's been the Bank, the Funnel, the Vault, and one or two other venues whose names I can't recall. Jen Shuvani and her new beau are here - the theme for today seems to be women I've been sweet on getting with younger taller men, which is sort of depressing to contemplate...but still it's nice to see a familiar face.

Later on, a familiar looking fellow walks up to me. It's Mike and Joe's old neighbor Brian, a Smalltimore moment; we chat about languages and spirituality and Okinawa and martial arts and various stuff.

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